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This is why I'd make an amusing but terrible babysitter. Also why I don't tell stories that often.

Yes, this was written all off the top of my head.

Izzy: oooh, tell me a story.

Chait Wolf: All righty.

Chait Wolf: Once upon a time, in a faroff jungle, there was a troupe of adventuring monkeys. One was named Ilzabar, the fighter-mage elf monkey. Another was Buklit, the thieving hobbit monkey. The last in the group was Bob, the munchkin monkey with full plate and a +4 vorpal longsword.

Izzy: oooh :) *is suitably impressed*

Chait Wolf: In travelling, they came across a secret map showing the way to a hidden dungeon with lots of monkey-type treasure. Bananas, coconuts, and a guaranteed 600 platinum pieces worth of jewels!

Izzy: ooo ooo eee eee eeee *jumps around*

Chait Wolf: Ilzabar said "Hmm...this looks like it will be heavily guarded. I will have ample chance to improve my skills."

Chait Wolf: Buklit said "These monkey treasures would fetch a mighty price in the monkey cities."

Chait Wolf: Bob said "d00d! XP and l007!!! b17<#3z l37z g0!!!" (Bob said, "Brothers! We shall learn and gain much in our travels. Let us no longer tarry here, time is of the essence.")

Izzy: LOL

Chait Wolf: And so, they left. Many monkey-hours of travel later, they reached the hidden dungeon with its mystical monkey treasures.

Chait Wolf: Buklit said "I'll go first and make sure that no traps lay in our path."

Chait Wolf: Ilzabar said "I'll go second and use my mighty monkey-elven magicks to prevent any from harming us."

Chait Wolf: Bob said, "r0xx0r!!! j00 d0 d@7 n iLL b s@f3!!! f00z." (Wonderful! You do that and I shall guard the rear from any entering behind us, my faithful comrades.)

Izzy: *giggles insanely*

Chait Wolf: And thus they entered the hidden dungeon with its unknown dangers. They used their monkey wits to sneak past lethal traps, used their muscles and speed to defeat a vast horde of evil monkey-orcs and monkey-goblins. At last they reached a huge door locked in a curious manner.

Chait Wolf: Buklit said "I'll pick the lock in no time." But, he failed.

Chait Wolf: Ilzabar said "I'll use my

magicks to spell the door open." But, he failed.

Izzy: This is very entertaining. Are you making this up as you go?

Chait Wolf: Bob said "hAh4 b17<3z!!!! m4 $TR iz 21!!!!" (Ah ha! I shall use my mighty strength to force the door open!) But, he too failed. However, he rolled his die into the floor and claimed it was actually a 19, which handily got the door open.

Chait Wolf: Their adventure has ended. Ilzabar continued to refine his skills until he was known far and wide as the mightiest monkey-elven fighter-mage in the jungle. Buklit used the proceeds of the sale of his share of the monkey-treasure to live comfortably until the end of his days. And Bob said "d3wd!!! d1$ wuz @ ll@(/)3 5th lvl du||g30||!!! 3y3 w4n7 @|| 07#3r!!" (My friends, this adventure poorly rewarded me for its challenges. I shall go forth and gain riches and fame through my other exploits. Adieu.")

Slainte!

John-Boy